2021 Recap

I am quite nervous while typing this out, thinking what if this post makes it to the draft collection, rather than a published blog post? Lord, I am so bad with expressing myself. Over the years, I have grown so insecure about everything from my thought process to language and vocabulary. But it's 2022 and I'm going to be 25 years old this year... /cries/ So my new year resolutions are, among others, to read and write more. Very simple goal but the biggest enemy in the picture would be my procrastination self and... limited time for the huge chunk of my 24 hours are to be shared with clients now. Gorgeous gorgeous girls be living that corporate life but lowkey are depressed. 

My previous post was a year ago in December 2020 and it's January 2022 now. It has been a year. 2021 is certainly a year of flavours - my previous post was a quick announcement on me embarking pupillage and at present, not that I only have completed my pupillage, I have officially graduated and being called to the bar too! You heard it right, I'm a LLB (Malaya) holder and officially a lawyer (!!!) Can you believe it? These milestones are still surreal to me. I made it through the thunderstorms; I made it to the shore. I also received a retainment offer as a legal associate from the department I assisted with as a pupil. I accepted the offer and have been working as legal executive from September - November, and as legal associate on 10th December onwards when I was officially called to the bar.

In July of the same year, my small family was infected with Covid-19. My mom was diagnosed with stage-5 Covid infection, was sent to MAEPS and eventually Hospital Sungai Buloh. While the rest of us were infected with stage-3 Covid infection, obtained home surveillance order. It was a nightmare for all of us. We were all yet to be vaccinated at that point of time, except for myself - I had my AstraZeneca first dose, a week prior to the infection. Thankfully with the Almighty's love and grace; and continuous prayers from families and friends who care about us, we are able to reunite as family again. Syukur, Alhamdulillah. 

I believe those are the significant stories to be highlighted for now.

In essence, 2021 was personally a challenging and uncomfortable year to me, having to constantly adjust to life demands. I would rate it 5 over 10; negative 5 for occasionally having to put my physical and mental health on pause, and positive 5 for the daily milestones reached. I can still say that even on my rough days, I would still get up and attempt to give my all. My everyday is filled with growth, definitely. 

And I'm welcoming 2022, this year with growth coupled with love, patience, perseverance, tenacity and strength. 

May I find my little wins daily to keep me going. 

Aamin.

FINALLY

IT'S 2020.

Phew. Can you believe it that it's 2020, now? It's so crazy how fast the earth spins. Time really needs to slow down, I am so not looking forward to become an adult. I see that adulting isn't as nice as one's wish for it to be. Nevertheless, am still going to stay optimistic, pal. No one says it's going to be easy anyway. 

NOW CATCH UP, SESH!

I just finished my semester 7 final exam yesterday. Semester 7 or 3 1/2 years of school, guys. I am one semester away to bid law school goodbye (aamin!) and where did all the time go huh. To be honest, the sentimental me kind of regret a little for not religiously updating this site so I'd be able to reread the described memories in the future. But then again, there are photos in the gallery, instagram, facebook and ... twitter (sort of, thought mostly it's just of my rants about the weather or my hungry tummy). Anyway, exam was okay. I had a last paper syndrome real bad. Like so so bad. I can't remember when was the last time I dwelled over last paper. I tweeted about it twice or thrice and that's bad 'cause I sounded desperate ha-ha-ha but I'm so so so glad for a month break starting today! Alhamdulillah.

Anyway I just checked out the previous posts and the last time I updated about school was a year ago, or rather a short quick update and apology for not being active on this site. Again, ha-ha-ha-ha-ha :( I am really sorry :( This apology is for no one but for myself, for not being able to write down the little milestones embraced. Ugh this year, I will try to write more. Even the random stuff or occasions. I should appreciate this space better, really really really have to.

School was alright. I really don't want to start with the law school being the busiest... or hardest ... or any other remarks that will frown students from other courses. Law school was okay, it was a typical law school thingy. Reading cases, preparing case notes / class notes, assignments, role plays, tutorials, quizzes, tests and now that I am in the final year of law school, we have three courses with on going assessment so I kinda died half-way through it. The worst was during the mid-semester break. Everything was like BAM at once. Never want to revisit that phase again.  Nonetheless, all blessings go to the Almighty for the strength to endure until this day. 

Anyway, this semester was generally productive for me. In terms of studying, I kinda back on track in terms of putting more effort into it. That's probably because I have no other student bodies' commitments, or I am just more motivated to do good for my second last lap. I really really really hope it will fix my cgpa. Aaamin! In terms of participation in the faculty, I went to Bandung and Chiang Mai for international clinical legal education programmes. Phew, now that I think about it, I didn't update this site about me, being the COP 18/19 Director... Aaaak, ok maybe in the next post I'll write more about it. Oh and to wrap up December 2019, the UMLR was so nice to feature me under the person of the month column :( Ee Jiee wrote it beautifully and I am so in awe - link . So so so grateful that the post captured most of my law school journey. Then, study break and exam. And now, I am here, on my first day of break.

So this one month rest, I am going to spend most of it with healthy lifestyle because that's 2020 objective. I really need to appreciate my body, my skin, my health, myself. 2020 is about being healthy; physically, mentally, emotionally and socially. 

I'll update more (hopefully!!) so can't wait to be able to write again. 

Hugs!

Commitments... and more commitments

OH MY GOD.

I miss blogging so much. I'm not even kidding, guys.

I switched on my laptop, connected to the network, and here am typing before I click the publish button. I am so happy to be back here. I know that it wasn't that long since the last time I published a post #dramaticqausar #ohwell, but I always try to find time to let myself write. It feels very comforting to find myself pressing these buttons on the keyboard.

Life has been so busy lately and I couldn't help myself every night before sleep to stop thinking about updating this blog. I'm aware of the fact that not many of people (including friends) stop by this humble site of mine but I do feel a little sense of belonging to keep it update so I'll be able to reread and walk down the memory lane here in future. Yezza, back to sentimental qausar as always lol.

So, these are my commitments or reasons why I don't have time to socialise or why I choose sleep over people or why I get tired easily and emotional on certain nights.

1) Head marketing for LawNite

2) Head marketing for Wangi Jadi Saksi production for KARVITER 2018.

3) Secretary for Community Outreach Programme (COP).

4) and I might be joining MAG again this year.

And recently, I attended the 6th Asia Pro Bono Conference and had a week of Streetlaw workshop at the faculty under COP which it involved the international students. It was hella exhausting that I fell sick to the point my body was shivering non-stop and I could only manage to lay down in bed. No worries, ain't complaining, just telling. I'm independent woman tiber. 

Hopefully, I have more time to blog around. For now, toodles!

First Day of The 3rd Semester

Oh em gee. It's 0206 a.m in the morning and I just had my second day of second-year life (do I actually live? hahaha) in law school #howcrazy #ithinkigrowsomewrinkles. Time surely flies in a blink of an eye when I unproductively spent my two months holiday with KDramas, scrolling my Instagram feed, hanging out with friends and .... sleeping most of the time. Sometimes I wonder whether I'm actually a polar bear in disguise or... hmm nvm. I'm not white anyway. 

The first day went so well, Alhamdulillah. During the morning, I got so nervous. Suddenly the systems in my body went crazy. One time I wanted to puke, then I rushed to pee and later I found myself doing star jump to ease the active butterflies in my tummy hill. 

(COP= Community Outreach Programme)

I arrived faculty, did some cut & paste for the COP board, changed my t-shirt to COP 's new t-shirt (yes fam, we have a new design!), went to Dean's briefing, attended an introductory session for the first year's orientation, conducted a booth session, had a quick meeting with Prof (who is also now a Datin #sohappyforher! ) Bani and a short meeting with the cop high-com until 7pm, then went back to hostel. FUHHH. It was indeed a tiring day but everything went smoothly that there's nothing to complain of #blessed

What a productive day and such a good day to begin my third semester.

Us with Prof Bani 

There were also several events happened during the day that I'd like to convert it in words so I can later reread back and get emotional (bahahaha). But later in the next post. 

Stay tuned! 

Letting Go

Lately, I have been detoxing unwanted negativity elements in my life. I removed people and let go wishes which meant to stay wishes. I realise that as I get older I tend to be very cautious with every decision I make and I become choosy with people whom I want to surround with. There were several friendships that I chose to give up, hence it did not turn up such way it supposed or used to be. It is really sad when you do not talk anymore with someone who you previously share your days, your insecurities, your hopes, your ambition- basically, someone who you were attached at heart with. 

Walking away is not an easy thing. It really takes a huge courage. I took a big step of moving on from unhealthy friendships; one which gets me tired and one day, I had enough so I decided to give up. The weight of memories did kill me a little from time to time (even until this day). On some nights and empty days, I had thought like, "Why did this friendship end?" or me wishing to go back to old days, but I know myself for sure that will not likely be happened. 

Tonight is one of the nights where I am lying on my bed, counting the old memories but I just do not want to go back.

Busy girl

Hola amigos.

I'm now home. But just for a night 'cause I'll be back tomorrow. Though it's Wednesday (I don't have any classes every Weds hihi) but I've a replacement Contract II tutorial tomorrow. So yeap, I'll be saying hi to um pj gate tomorrow noon. Hm well I'm actually waiting for maghrib to berbuka puasa ganti. Ramadhan is coming up soon, better be prepared physically, mentally and in a good state of Iman, insyaAllah.

It's week 5 according to the academic calendar. Everyone's getting busier. Assignment due date and tests approaching. Besides the hectic usual routine of a law student's life, I have extra commitments for 12th College Dinner @ MAG as a sponsorship bureau, involved myself with the UMxUI Street Law program under COP as well as being the secretary for my batch's social engagement and the college's magazine, Royalzine. Phew. I can tell you that my life has been so productive and and full with excitement lately. There's always something that I look forward to everyday. I'm so blessed and content for the opportunity and experiences I had and have. In fact, one of my goal this semester is to stretch out my potential to the best I could and to embrace every moments productively.

Maghrib is in 10 minutes. *run to the dining table*

InsyaAllah I'll update more, soon!

*vaccum*

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim

I am sorry that i always come here, typing then end up saving the posts as draft instead.  I am not a good writer huuuuu.

life update

1) i am working in a pharmacy. 

wooohoooo yeap. it has been around two months now and I am quitting end of this month heee. I'll blog longer about my experiences and what i learnt later, insyaAllah. 

2) i got my examination result for semester two. 

i actually wrote a very long post for this matter but at the very last minute of posting, i had some thoughts that stopped me from clicking the "publish" button. i am very very very afraid of being judged. but just to let you know that my result was, alhamdulillah beyond my expectation. 

3) eid

selamat hari raya semua! maaf zahir batin atas segala salah silap, yang tersengaja dan tak sengaja. and any of the wrong doings towards me, forgiven too! kosong kosong ye.

i have a lot of thoughts and words to share but i dont know where to start! hopefully, i am able to hihi 

that's all for now, adios!