Lady Boss and Her Final Note

As promised, I'm back here writing for a post, yeay! I am lowkey proud of myself guys, because usually the next post will be published in the year after. Haha. I have to be more disciplined, it's 2020 for God sake.

So, I did tell that I was the COP Director 2018/2019 in the previous post. I had an amazing year of working with my awesome 50 committee members, guided by dearest Prof Bani and Kak Aisyah. I was nominated and voted for the position, nonetheless I still think that it was luck was on my side as the other candidates, who are my friends, are capable so of that position. Regardless, I am so thankful for the priceless opportunity that comes together with leadership experience, life lessons and long lasting friendship acquired. Alhamdulillah. 

So how was it being a director? 

Honestly, it was not easy, yet bearable. Just like any other presidents or directors of student bodies, I freaked out a lot about striving for perfection. I may sound like I am exaggerating, but I used to wake up daily and the first thing I thought during shower is the to-do-lists for COP. I wanted everything to be running smoothly as planned, I reminded and pushed everyone in the group to carry out the tasks assigned and there were days when I found myself micromanaging and honestly, that is not a good trait of a leader, as you should delegate the tasks and be as inclusive as possible. But I guess it's a head thing (based on heart to heart talk with sahibae and corcor), you tend to want things to settle fast so you don't mind to do it by yourself, and because you're the one who's doing it, you know you'll put the satisfied amount of effort in task - cause you strive for best and nothing less. And it's not about others not being able to do it because most of the times, they do. And that's a trust issue which I struggled yet overcame after time. Hashtag, so proud of myself. By second semester, I fully trusted them and moved on from the insecurity for I have always knew that they're my back bone and that I can always rely on them, whenever and wherever. 

Being a director also means you have to be selfless. Have, hence it's not an option. If you are already a selfless person, then it's relatively easier but for those who aren't, it's a thing we learn later acquire in the leaders' club. Maybe a leader can choose to not be one, but the later impact towards club and members, will just show you what kind of leader you are. So, question: define selfless? Selfless can be wide, but for this discussion it revolves around the boss participation with either the members or club activities - for example, in COP, we have trips to various institutions. So, if I have a COP trip or other matter that is as equally important like the trip, the qausar director without hesitation would choose the former. But qausar first or second year COP member, would have chosen the latter - because her mindset is that there will be always cop trip and she can always participate in the future. 

When I was a director, I participated in most of the activities and was really engaged  with the members. At first, I honestly did it out of obligation - you know the responsibility of making the club running and the members to feel belonged to this safe space. But after awhile, it was out of willingness. I found this sweet feeling mixed with contentment and the excitement to spend time with committee members and learners. I also have gotten remarks like, "of course you have to be there, you are the director kut?" True, but a director isn't alone and there's a high committee to support his/her back. This was something I learnt; to draw a line between giving my all, being available all the time and to let others take in charge when I'm in need of rest. 

Last time when I wasn't a director, I always minded my own performance; be it for my own portfolio like secretary or a slot in charge for the lesson plan, for example evaluation or mini lecture. I was at my happiest state when learners reciprocate what had been taught, or my director satisfied with my work. But when I wore the director hat, it was no longer about me and my performance, rather the input gained by committee members. 

Being a lady boss was a self-growth journey. There were times when I hated myself for feeling lonely - syok sendiri, pushy, emotional and ungrateful (for wanting more and more) when there was nothing or no one did anything to me anyway; it was just me being me. I definitely learnt to be a better leader and the person I am today. I am certainly wiser, mature and composed now. I did not overthink or overreact like I used to hihi. And I am so happy that I am resting now.

Being in COP for the past 3 years, it has been very incredible to witness the growth of this club. Year by year, massive changes and improvements took place with the dedication by every committed members. And if there’s one thing that is constant since 2017 until today is that, COP has always been a home and will always be to me. I am totally in awe for all the milestones and achievements had by this club. I will surely miss doing street law later when graduating. To be able to spread hope, reach those who though they aren't part of the society is so fulfilling when being rewarded with their sparkle joy eyes. And for the continuous process of learning, delivering and attaining skills, I was blessed with new friendships, new addition to my law school survival kit.

I also am grateful for the congratulatory wishes from lecturers and law faculty members about the constant improvement of COP. I did have a concrete pillar to face ups and downs throughout the year. I am so indebted to my supportive reliable high committee; harry, alya, hakiim, azureen and syuhada, and the amazing head bureaus, dee, erin and umyra. They really put up with my annoying ass and had faith in my imperfect lead even when I, myself didn't. They were my voice when I was unable to make choice. I wish I could give them all the love and credit they deserved because they were really the persons behind this success of 2018/2019 tenure. 

And here a shout out to all COP family members. Thank you for choosing COP, for taking pride in COP and for adding colours to COP and making it your home. I wish this safe space will continually grow. I certainly can't wait to see all the wonders this club will attain in few years. 

Thank you for everything, Community Outreach Programme UM. 

:) 

FINALLY

IT'S 2020.

Phew. Can you believe it that it's 2020, now? It's so crazy how fast the earth spins. Time really needs to slow down, I am so not looking forward to become an adult. I see that adulting isn't as nice as one's wish for it to be. Nevertheless, am still going to stay optimistic, pal. No one says it's going to be easy anyway. 

NOW CATCH UP, SESH!

I just finished my semester 7 final exam yesterday. Semester 7 or 3 1/2 years of school, guys. I am one semester away to bid law school goodbye (aamin!) and where did all the time go huh. To be honest, the sentimental me kind of regret a little for not religiously updating this site so I'd be able to reread the described memories in the future. But then again, there are photos in the gallery, instagram, facebook and ... twitter (sort of, thought mostly it's just of my rants about the weather or my hungry tummy). Anyway, exam was okay. I had a last paper syndrome real bad. Like so so bad. I can't remember when was the last time I dwelled over last paper. I tweeted about it twice or thrice and that's bad 'cause I sounded desperate ha-ha-ha but I'm so so so glad for a month break starting today! Alhamdulillah.

Anyway I just checked out the previous posts and the last time I updated about school was a year ago, or rather a short quick update and apology for not being active on this site. Again, ha-ha-ha-ha-ha :( I am really sorry :( This apology is for no one but for myself, for not being able to write down the little milestones embraced. Ugh this year, I will try to write more. Even the random stuff or occasions. I should appreciate this space better, really really really have to.

School was alright. I really don't want to start with the law school being the busiest... or hardest ... or any other remarks that will frown students from other courses. Law school was okay, it was a typical law school thingy. Reading cases, preparing case notes / class notes, assignments, role plays, tutorials, quizzes, tests and now that I am in the final year of law school, we have three courses with on going assessment so I kinda died half-way through it. The worst was during the mid-semester break. Everything was like BAM at once. Never want to revisit that phase again.  Nonetheless, all blessings go to the Almighty for the strength to endure until this day. 

Anyway, this semester was generally productive for me. In terms of studying, I kinda back on track in terms of putting more effort into it. That's probably because I have no other student bodies' commitments, or I am just more motivated to do good for my second last lap. I really really really hope it will fix my cgpa. Aaamin! In terms of participation in the faculty, I went to Bandung and Chiang Mai for international clinical legal education programmes. Phew, now that I think about it, I didn't update this site about me, being the COP 18/19 Director... Aaaak, ok maybe in the next post I'll write more about it. Oh and to wrap up December 2019, the UMLR was so nice to feature me under the person of the month column :( Ee Jiee wrote it beautifully and I am so in awe - link . So so so grateful that the post captured most of my law school journey. Then, study break and exam. And now, I am here, on my first day of break.

So this one month rest, I am going to spend most of it with healthy lifestyle because that's 2020 objective. I really need to appreciate my body, my skin, my health, myself. 2020 is about being healthy; physically, mentally, emotionally and socially. 

I'll update more (hopefully!!) so can't wait to be able to write again. 

Hugs!

Dejavu

I was standing in front of my society's booth, promoting to the juniors to join us. Suddenly, a girl came up to Dilla and me. We greeted her, explained on how COP works in the faculty, and in the middle of explaining, she cut us off politely and asked, "Okay ke belajar dekat sini? Exam, belajar, kawan kawan?"

That was random. Thought that she was going to ask something related to our club. That curiosity left both of us silent and we simultaneously exchanged glance. We mumbled awkwardly, trying to find the right words to say. Both of us know that we were not supposed to make her feel down. It was her freaking first day in law school. We answered, "Okay je. Mula mula memang susah tapi lama lama nanti dah adapt, you'll be okay"

AND. SURPRISE! THIS. GIRL. IN. FRONT. OF. US. SUDDENLY. BURST. INTO. TEARS

---

It was like dejavu. The chills run in my vein and give me shiver.

Looking at her crying, it brought me back to my first-semester journey. It was difficult. I always thought that I've prepared physically and mentally for the hurdles but heh I was fooled with the idea of optimism. An image of me as a freshman popped out. I vividly saw me crying of culture shock during the freshies' night; crying at the back of the law library on the third week of semester because I could not comprehend what the hell is R v Willans's judgement. Recalling back, I totally felt that UM was a wrong decision I made at that point of life and this place will never be a place I can call home. 

But, it's true when they say time heals. Owing to the fact that the second month, it felt a little bit better. On the third month, it felt a lot better. Then onwards until this day, law school life is totally fine and bearable though it can be such pain in the ass sometimes lol but I guess I'm getting used to this ambience already. It feels so good to be well-adapted when I thought I would not at the beginning. 

---

Dilla and I reflexly hugged her tightly and convinced her that everything will be okay. I whispered to her, "It's okay to cry, for now. I used to feel the same way too" 

First Day of The 3rd Semester

Oh em gee. It's 0206 a.m in the morning and I just had my second day of second-year life (do I actually live? hahaha) in law school #howcrazy #ithinkigrowsomewrinkles. Time surely flies in a blink of an eye when I unproductively spent my two months holiday with KDramas, scrolling my Instagram feed, hanging out with friends and .... sleeping most of the time. Sometimes I wonder whether I'm actually a polar bear in disguise or... hmm nvm. I'm not white anyway. 

The first day went so well, Alhamdulillah. During the morning, I got so nervous. Suddenly the systems in my body went crazy. One time I wanted to puke, then I rushed to pee and later I found myself doing star jump to ease the active butterflies in my tummy hill. 

(COP= Community Outreach Programme)

I arrived faculty, did some cut & paste for the COP board, changed my t-shirt to COP 's new t-shirt (yes fam, we have a new design!), went to Dean's briefing, attended an introductory session for the first year's orientation, conducted a booth session, had a quick meeting with Prof (who is also now a Datin #sohappyforher! ) Bani and a short meeting with the cop high-com until 7pm, then went back to hostel. FUHHH. It was indeed a tiring day but everything went smoothly that there's nothing to complain of #blessed

What a productive day and such a good day to begin my third semester.

Us with Prof Bani 

There were also several events happened during the day that I'd like to convert it in words so I can later reread back and get emotional (bahahaha). But later in the next post. 

Stay tuned! 

An English Essay

An English essay about... English language 

Well, I think I deserve to be punched in the face..... or maybe all over my body because of the long hiatus. I'm sorry for ditching you my dearest blog. Here, several reasons to believe in. Firstly, I've been busy with law school and secondly, (this reason contributes to the neglect the most) every time I want to type out my rants, I tend to think so much about my grammar, vocab, and stuff so it demotivates me to write. One of the many things that degree uni life has taught me is to have a good fluent English is good. My English was several times pointed out for sounding too Malay-ish. I was also once or twice being shot by indirect tweets for this particular insecurity. Hence, these two semesters (first and second semester of degree life), I've been swallowing my words, hold back myself from giving opinions that I'd love to raise.  

English Nazis are truly something. And the fact that most of them come from my own.... race is so devastating. I mean, why don't you let people speak their heart out? I understand that we should not let English being wrongly preached and for that, we should encourage others to speak better in a manner that would not crush their inner drive and motivation. My humble advice to the language nazis, is to help and motivate more. Stop looking down on people with bad English because their opinions, ideas or arguments might be better than ours. Or it can be that they are in a learning process and, they will get better, probably better than us. And also, always be grateful for the good language you are granted with. There are some people in life who wish to have the good language and accent you have but again,  it's you who are blessed with it. So, be grateful and be nice to those who aren't in the same shoes. 

Good grammars and wide vocabulary are spices to beautify and give more feels to the readers. And grammar IS REALLY IMPORTANT. Grammar has too many rules! It's the law of the English language that you have to follow when you write or speak. The basic one (am, is, are, was, were, singular with s or without, plural with s or without, they they're their and etcs SORRY I AM NOT A TESL STUDENT BUT AM TRYING) must be learned and conquered. Yes, it is understandable that not everyone masters it but always, always and always try to learn. I took time until form 3 to get my basic grammar right. And now, I'm still working on it as well as trying to expand my vocabulary. As I said, I'm nowhere near good. I used to live in frustration for not able to speak a good language, been living timidly gulping my stands and thoughts, questions that I'd like to ask in class but I held back, scared of being judged, cried in silence asking why I am me, why I am not her or him...  I lost my confidence in law school for countless times... just because of the way I speak. I used to live in regrets, so IF YOU FEEL DOWN AND DEMOTIVATED, I AM TELLING YOU TO NOT GIVE UP. JUST SPEAK. because most of them are using this rule:

The haters will continue hating, your envy friends will continue envy (real friends don't), the judgemental will continue judging. I choose not to waste time while they continue to let me sip the negativity they served. This time, I have had enough living for who I'm not. I honestly have no idea why this time I was swayed with those says. I'm just glad that I'm over it. 

Also, I am eternally thankful for a number of supportive friends I have. They lift me up, help me to gain my self-confidence and always remind me that I'm beyond myself that I portrayed in my mind. There are several of my batch mates (who actually speak far better than me) complimented my English. I swear I scolded them 'cause I took that as a sarcasm/insult (I'm so sensitive when it comes to this matter sigh) And I remember that once during my first semester, there was this one lawyer who stopped by our law library, had a short conversation with me. While we were conversing, out of nowhere, he said that I have a good English :( I want to cry :( Am I dreaming :( And coming from a big person, I was so excited sharing this happiness with this one friend of mine (who I used to spend my days with)  but she turned me down, so too bad,  the excitement did not last long. 

In case you're wondering why this whole English thingy WAS something big to me, I don't really have an answer to this as I also don't know why. Last time during MRSM time, I really don't have any problem to present myself in front of hundreds of crowd. I guess the fear started during foundation where my mistakes were pointed out in front of the rest of my classmates when I said 'rape' as 'rap' and 'shooted' for 'shot'. And the fear bloomed extravagantly during my first year of degree life. Perhaps it was because I was in the process of adapting so I became very fragile and sensitive to everything and everyone around me. Hmm that must be it.

Very very very glad that I can finally cut off this insecurity. The fact that next semester, I'll be taking mooting as a subject and now I'm done with feeling not confident and all, I'm so relieved and thankful. 

Alhamdulillah. Oh Allah, thank you for the strength You grant me with.

Busy girl

Hola amigos.

I'm now home. But just for a night 'cause I'll be back tomorrow. Though it's Wednesday (I don't have any classes every Weds hihi) but I've a replacement Contract II tutorial tomorrow. So yeap, I'll be saying hi to um pj gate tomorrow noon. Hm well I'm actually waiting for maghrib to berbuka puasa ganti. Ramadhan is coming up soon, better be prepared physically, mentally and in a good state of Iman, insyaAllah.

It's week 5 according to the academic calendar. Everyone's getting busier. Assignment due date and tests approaching. Besides the hectic usual routine of a law student's life, I have extra commitments for 12th College Dinner @ MAG as a sponsorship bureau, involved myself with the UMxUI Street Law program under COP as well as being the secretary for my batch's social engagement and the college's magazine, Royalzine. Phew. I can tell you that my life has been so productive and and full with excitement lately. There's always something that I look forward to everyday. I'm so blessed and content for the opportunity and experiences I had and have. In fact, one of my goal this semester is to stretch out my potential to the best I could and to embrace every moments productively.

Maghrib is in 10 minutes. *run to the dining table*

InsyaAllah I'll update more, soon!

sem one, done.

Hello there.

Phew, semester one of my degree life has ended. It feels so good to be home alhamdulillah. I actually have so many things to blog about and finally, I've got plenty time to do so /sengih sampai telinga/ I waited for moments like this since the beginning of semester, and so glad it's over now *giggling*

This semester to put it in a world would be... tiring. Very tiring. That Saturday evening after Asar (the day exam ended), I sat beside Nabilah and we talked about how time actually flies. Me being a cry baby as usual, I... cried. I'm so emotional that the semester has come to an end. The syllabus, the people, the environment, all come in one package, it was a hella ride. It was challenging for me. 

When I received the offer letter from UM, never cross in my mind it would be this hard. I remember writing a letter to my future self (yes, I do this kind of stuff lol), I wrote for only half way because I thought that "alah, takkanla first semester susah sangat. Next sem kita tulis". What was I thinking? hahaha, adoi. I was totally wrong. It's the first semester me, who needed that letter the most. Too bad, tak habis tulis pun. I'm so so so glad that I was able to go through with the help and motivation from supportive family and friends. Also am thankful to Allah who grants me strength and ease my task.

Studies.
This semester, I registered seven subjects; 4 law subjects, 3 university courses. 4 law subjects namely Contract  I, Tort I, Legal Method and Malaysian Legal System. As for university courses, the subjects were Information Literacy, TITAS and Ethnic Relation. Basically, university courses are courses that you have to sit for the exam for the sake of graduating extra knowledge and skills. All in all, no biggie for the uni courses. The subjects were fine. Except when it comes to group work. The group members were mostly random because we all came from different faculty. So I had an experience working with engineering (mechanical & software) students and also those from the social science faculty. Of course, there were ups and downs. The downs would be during the process of preparing the slides and video for TITAS, as for ER it was during the video presentation itself. And of course, we learn from our downfall aite?

I learned a lot throughout the process. To be honest, never in my life have I worked in a team which the members took group assignments lightly. I will never understand the mindset "oh this isn't a core subject, so it's okay, don't have to beria sangat". Alahai. I pity those who have this kind of mentality. Be it uni courses or core courses, knowledge is knowledge. I understand that uni courses can be a burden sometimes, I sighed and complained too (yela tutorial tak siap lagi, law subjects tak habis cover, tapi kena kejar due date assignment uni courses- gilaaaa tak serabut). But then again, these subjects are my escape from facts and heavy materials that sometimes, my mind really needs a break from legal jargons. I learned to appreciate these subjects. I also learned to expect less and to give more. All this while, I've always been that girl who puts a high expectation when it comes to tasks given; be it an individual or a group work; I'll always make sure that I give my very best. But that's the thing. Not everyone wills to do the same, so you got to expect less to hurt less later. I also learned to be more sincere, more patient (it was hard for me to hold myself back from cursing and not crying tsktsk), and less emotional when it comes to teamwork. Really maaan, you gotta be sincere of the work and time you invest so when the outcome does not satisfy you, at least sincerity will make you feel better. The power of faith. Bingo.

Here's the climax. Law subjects /giggles/ ok kena gelak sikit sebab nak cover perasaan cuak result final exam. Law subjects were difficult. Hm, I didn't expect it to be any less easy honestly. But during the beginning of the semester, I aimed to not only pass but to score with flying colours. but now all that I want is to pass all papers HAHAHA haih look at what law school has done to me :( The subjects are hard, unbearable at the first instance you read but fine after awhile. And this is the best thing about the subjects, they are all interesting! (to me la) I think that's the x-factor which inspires me to study law. Aish sounds nerdy as hell but I do, I really do. I enjoyed completing my tutorial, going to lecture, hm bet the readers feel like puking after reading this hahaha I'm sorry, I can be a geek at times. Did I tell you that my roommate is from science & maths department? Oh God. Looking at her dealing with the algebras and numbers, I would rather write for two hours non-stop (mind you, I proved it during the examination haha!) There were times when  I felt like quitting because it was hard. But of course, they were merely words. I said it, but my heart refused to give it up. Hence, I grow stronger.

Let's talk about the final exam. Overall, it was so-so. Some papers were bearable, some were difficult but none of the papers were easy. Hahaha /cry/  I didn't know how to put it in words but let's together hope and pray that I don't have to repeat any of the papers, I just want to pass. Back then in asasi, I always thought that the seniors were exaggerating about LLB is a real struggle and headache to many.  Sorry for thinking that you guys were lying sobs. Now only I feel the pain. It's true. It's difficult, I must say it. But tho it's hard, that's the beauty of it. If I were to go back and choose between law and something else or UM and other universities, I would still choose the path I chose five months ago. Now, this brings the memory of a conversation I had with Unee. We were on the bus on our way to the faculty, "Kalau boleh putar balik masa, kau masuk UiTM tak? (the other offer besides UM was UiTM)" A gap of silence before I answered "Tak".  Like what they said, struggling means you're living, you're on the right path. Hopefully, I am. Aamin.


Environment
When I was in my lower secondary, I was in a sekolah harian of mix races. However, the only non-Malays in my class were only four Indian friends of mine. No Chinese. Then, I went to MRSM Taiping for my upper secondary. After SPM, I pursued the UiTM law foundation . Again, all bumiputras just like back then in Taiping. I know right! I am always surrounded by my own people. That's one of the reasons why I chose to be here. Hamagad, teringat pula interview UM. I mentioned this fact to the interviewers (and guess what, one of the interviewers was my Contract I lecturer *black moon emoji*)

So my batch is the 45th batch consists of mix races from all over Malaysia. They are all nice people, geniuses, and opinionated people. I'm from Atkin tutorial group. My classmates are all so baik, I love each of them so much. Macam exaggerate kan tapi I'm not kidding. This is the truth. When I heard others complaining about their tutorial mates, I knew that  I'm blessed with the current classmates I have.  They are very helpful, hard working, not kiasu and willing to be there for one another especially when it comes to syllabus. Argh, I want to cry now, I love my classmates (psssstsss qausar stop jangan over please) Let me tell you something. Kalau you ada cooperative classmates who are not kiasu, you're going to go through your law school much easier. Seriously. Now this reminds me of a conversation I shared with Asha. "Rizq, you tahu tak I'm so grateful for our classmate tau. Semua orang tak kiasu. Kalau nak minta tolong or tanya soalan, ada je yang offer to help" my reply was  of course, "KAAAAAAAAAANNNN" and we were in the library..... so guess how many eyes were on me? many.

I stay inside the campus- in KK12, the largest among other colleges. The facilities are okay, there foods are also okay and there are so many- western, nasi campur, goreng goreng panas, burgers, cheese naan, kuih, fishballs, desserts like waffles, ice creams, and cakes. It's like a food court la, basically. Talk about the place where I sleep, my room consists of me and my only roommate, Amirah. She's a stats student from Science & Maths department, Science faculty. She loves numbers while I don't at all hahaha. We are close yet independent, I don't cling to her neither she. She understands me well; she gave me space when I needed it the most and always lift me up when I'm down. She also reminds me to turn back to Allah when things get rough. I am blessed with her presence, syukur Alhamdulillah.


Friends
I gained a lot of new acquaintance this semester. There are some I just met in UM, some I've known from UiTM but become closer when in here and of course, I still keep my Atans around (the ones from UM and other universities as well). I am blessed with my small precious circle of friends. They are my semester one survival kit (hopefully until the final semester (lamanya lagiiii) InsyaAllah).

Alah I nak kenalkan sorang sorang tapi takut ada yang terasa nanti sebab iolz banyak kawan kekeke, nahh just kidding. Well, you know who you are. I thank God every time I see your face, dear friends. I'm so thankful that they choose to stick by my side, accept and help me to improve my flaws, motivate me when I feel down, dan terima lawak lawak saya yang definitely kelakar (I know they secretly fancy me because I'm so funny and interesting kuikuikui okay I better stop now). Really, I'm so grateful for them. Eternally grateful ya rabb.




Overall, I think it wasn't really about the syllabus that made it difficult. But the fact that it's the first semester, the beginning of the degree's life. We struggled, trying to fit in, adapting in this new place. You see. It's okay to make mistakes and to be bitter about it sometimes. But, don't forget to move on and to not lose focus on the chances, opportunities and blessings that God has granted. Treasure the ups and the downs 'cause you need both to shape you. Indeed, my first semester was very challenging, yet it was bitter sweet enough to keep it as a memory that I'm going to cherish later in a few years.

Alhamdulillah. I am so happy. and grateful. Thank you, Lord.

Till the next post. Chow. 

Uni life (beginner version)

Dah lama nak update tapi macam tak tahu nak tulis apa huhuhu and the thought of writing in english buat aku rasa macam lagi .... err err... gitu hahaha masyaAllah muet is just around the corner!!!11!!! nak buat camne ni hahaha

So asasi 4 bulan was fuuuh, alhamdulillah sangar bersyukur atas segalanya. all the ups and downs but overall, syukur ya Rabb. it was good. 

Minggu destini siswa was a typical orientation. banyak sangat jeritan jeritan amuk para pembantu mahasiswa mahasiswi hahaha tetapi bukanlah salah mereka jika kami berkelakuan jelik sekali. entahlah bila masuk tempat baru ni, memang jumpa orang macam macam. yang menggatal, yang terkinja kinja, yang outspoken, yang mencarut 24 jam pergh MDS yang sangat ... bolehlah. cuma part paling tak tahan, kena buat 24 jam sorak sorak. tapi disebabkan aku seorang yang berbudi, maka ikut jelah arahan facilitator. dorang pun tak cukup tidur, so tak boleh lah nak selfish kan? tapi memang jelas nampak belang belang manusia yang bermuka monyok dan bermuncung tajam sambil berkata "ahh dia fikir kita budak budak ke" 

Nah belanja gambar MDS 

@ DATC

Para Ahli Bilik
Me-Ellya-Ain-Yasmeen

Selepas mengharungi liku liku pahit manis orientasi, here we go, the real business; lectures & tutorials. minggu akademik bermula. maka bermulahlah sesi tawaf di fakulti mencari kelas selain sesi suai kenal bersama ahli kelas. 

Asasi undang-undang dibahagikan kepada dua; asasi undang-undang uitm dan asasi undang-undang kptm. apakah bezanya? ya aku pun jemu nak menjawabnya huhu boleh tekan sini. (banyak sangat orang tanya huhu) and I'm from foundation of law kptm. jumlah kelas semua ada 17. satu kelas approximately 25-27 people. 

I have 27 classmates; 22 perempuan 5 lelaki. ya, 5 lelaki. tepuk tangan ramai ramai :') diorang semua ok je, boleh ajak lepak lepak makan ABC kat seksyen dua, juga boleh bersama-sama stay up untuk habiskan assignment sehingga tengah tengah pagi. 

Jika ditanya tentang first impression diorang pada aku mestilah aku seorang yang baik. malangnya itu cuma first impression kerana kemudiannya mereka memanggil aku "syaiton" :') Apakah dosaku sehingga digelar sedemikian rupa? :') 

Mula mula agak janggal nak bertegur sapa. tapi tak lama pun sebab semua jenis banyak mulut, hu ha hu ha, so semua jadi bertegur sapa. dalam masa seminggu kelas, dah boleh gelak gelak sambil berkata "weh sakit perut aku" dan masih terkekek-kekek. mereka juga sangat petah berkata-kata membuatkan aku terkadang rasa seperti ingin menjerit "diam diam aku memerlukan ketenangan" apabila rakan-rakan sekelasku mula mengadakan persidangan parlimen secara tiba-tiba. 

However, it is undeniable that they speak so well tip top melet0p. yelah takkan law students pemalu pulak kan (huhu apakah yang aku cuba justify ni) classsmates aku sangat riuh dan kepoh. kalau jalan ramai ramai nak pergi kelas,memang bajet diva la bising dia haha semua orang sangat ceria dan happening. aku sangat suka kelas aku sebab kami semua macam lek lek je pegi kelas tak overly dress up. and the bond between us classmates are strong. unite beb. lunch konvoi, solat zohor konvoi, lepas kelas kalau nak keluar pergi seksyen 7 / seksyen 2 pun sama-sama. bond dia macam covalent bond sebab kami selalu share makanan dan duit wahahaha no the bond is really special :) 

gambar time aku masih bertatih menghafal nama nama kamu semua LWA01F

konvoi satu kelas balik kolej 

 belanja gambar fakulti, ya memang  tangga batu caves huhu

semua orang tak reti duduk diam @ sambutan raya

Ada satu weekend tu, majoriti nak stay kolej siapkan assignment.
& Kami ambil kesempatan untuk berfutsal 

Black & white kinda day because we have presentation

Kalau group assignment memanjang dengan diorang since mula mula sem sampailah
habis sem because meja depan belakang je. Nama geng: powerpuff girl (maafkan atas nama
yang sangat comel ) 

This picture is taken after the last class; tanda tamat semester satu yeayy!!!!

Alhamdulillah syukur. sepanjang semester satu, sangat memenatkan (serious punya penat yang masa makan, masa tidur tak menentu) tapi students life kan, so takkan lah goyang kaki pulak kan kekeke tapi on the bright side, penat penat itu adalah petanda yang aku memanfaatkan masa lah kut, insyaAllah. semoga usaha yang aku taburkan membuahkan hasil insyaAllah.

Memang tak dinafikan yang mula mula masuk, aku mengalami penyakit mengungkit. apakah penyakit tersebut? haaaaaa penyakit tu macam mengenang memori masa lampau acah acah kau takleh move on hahaha I have to admit that I kinda struggle for the first few months. dari segi hostel life, it was alhamdulillah. maybe sebab sebelum ni duduk asrama. tapi part yang aku struggle betul is part nak adapt dengan orang-orang sekeliling. living in taiping really gave me chance to know Allah better and to learn Islam better.  tiba tiba bila masuk universiti, pap banyak gila orang dating yang beraksi pelik pelik, nak naik bas pun bertolak tolak macam tak bertamadun, orang orang dia dress up gegila hipster tapi nak ke kelas je pun huhuhu tak tak tak, I'm not judging. absolutely, it's their freedom of choice. cuma aku.... terkejut.... sebab selamani tak pernah lalui huhuhu

tapi bak kata oranglah. time does heal. lama lama tu,aku macam dah lali. pergi kelas pun macam, lantak k0 lah. lepas sebulan lebih, aku akhirnya boleh terima yang aku dekat uitm bukan dekat mrsm lagi *insert sad instrumental*  what i learnt is that, sometimes kita tak boleh expect yang semua orang rasa macam mana kita rasa. kadang-kadang kita rasa "eh benda ni macam tak elok je" but to certain people, benda tu ok je for them. background kita semua berbeza, kita bukan dari rahim dan environment yang sama. maka, personality dan behaviour kita adalah outcome dari apa yang kita lalui. apa yang aku went through lain dengan apa yang dia went through. so, what should we do? firstly, accept because dengan menerimalah kita dapat belajar sesuatu daripada mereka :)


pastu bila dah adapt, mula lah aku terkinja-kinja 24/7 kerana kegembiraan dan rasa kesyukuran di dalam hati wehehehe


tapi apa yang buat aku paling happy? haaaa haaa haaaaa apa diaaaa ce tekaaaa

I'm happy with the fact that ......


I'm studying the course that suits myself. 

I'm really happy that I finally feel that I'm back on track after struggling with science subjects for two years.

Syukur ya Rabb,Alhamdulillah 

;') 

Habis dah semester satu!!!!111!!! yeay!!